I love this topic. A favourite Niels Bohr quote I collected along the way: "The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."
SBK, this was a fantastic piece! Thank you and I'm going to share it with my adult children. Also, it reminded me of learning "systems thinking" in grad school. Some of its core ideas are: systems are made of interconnected parts; boundaries determine what you can see; causality is often circular, not linear; mental models shape actions. Yes/and is a powerful tool in helping one see the bigger picture and more of the underlying system.
There is a Beguiling Nature to the Search for Constancy
The world is not a neat and orderly place. It is battered by natural forces, economic uncertainty, and the vagaries caused by political disquiet. Adversity has always existed, to some extent, been the factor responsible for many personal and organizational failures. This has, however, encouraged humankind to try and understand, then manage capricious influences. Problem solving, then trial and error improvement have become the methods for changing conditions that interfere with the search for constancy.
Human nature is very much like a two-sided coin. It displays and reacts to dual inferences, each striving for attention. One side has a short-term orientation that is logical, and detailed, preferring facts over generalities. The other side has an extensive and broader perspective. It has a future orientation that appreciates feelings, imagination, images, and philosophy. Trying to build a constancy of purpose demands practices pay attention to implications presented by both sides. Facts that are data driven do not hold more weight than ideas backed by feelings and passion.
Being human means embracing both data and intuition. Recognize that emotions carry valuable information. Rather than suppressing feelings, use feelings as data to guide decision making. Interactions and self-awareness are approaches that help navigate the dynamics of decision making to create an environment where people comfortably take risks. By integrating both left and right hemisphere thinking into problem solving there is a better chance of finding workable solutions that will produce pride in high-quality outcomes.
Thank you for this. Maturity, in my mind, is understanding that good and bad can exist in the same space, most often do. That I can criticise someone or something without this meaning that they/it cannot contain positive sides as well. That people and events are hardly ever split into good or bad. And that goes for the plethora of therapies out there: All contain something, none nothing.
I love how you open my mind. I've been thinking about this topic for a long time, and reading your article made everything click. It just felt right, and I can wholeheartedly embrace the "yes and yes" perspective. Funny enough, it also feels a little scary though... :))
My son has just got into shooting clay targets. He’s 12. I’m buddhist. His dad is an old hippy.
??!!??
I worry that this sport will harden his heart towards other living beings.
AND I see his delight and skill in shooting: that this is my son growing towards the light.
Is the fact that my son loves shooting a gun disturbing? Yes.
Is my son a compassionate boy being taught by a capable and kind man, who shares my son’s delight in watching the wedge-tailed eagles soar above them on the hilltop? And.
And the other thing about truth: of the three times (past, present and future), the present is where binaries collapse. So I’m doing my darndest not to let the conceptual overlays of the future muddy up my son’s deeply interesting and alive present paradox.
Thanks, Barry, once again, for shooting down stuck thinking wherever you see it. Binaries: BANG!
All I can say is Yes And Finally others bringing this to a wider audience. SBK I’ve been quietly building InsideOut Creativity built on both/and. The origin story is raising two kids because of the necessity of finding a both/and approach in the education system. Which there is not so far. So we did it differently. Both by respecting the system - think Structure (and) then Flexibility. It was hard. We felt isolated at times. However we have the proof that this way of doing it creates successful people - in an InsideOut way of living. They are kind. They are creative. They are confident. They aren’t interested in beating the system. It’s not having competitive advantage. It’s knowing how to work with the system.
These values are the foundation of my professional work. I have been building a method that has 7 Touchpoints - 7 paradoxes for living, learning and leading. Launching very soon
I am so happy to hear your voice on this loud and clear. Thank you.
I have Leading for Tomorrow ready to dive into. Are you going to do a book study on it? I’d love to join to learn more if that happens anytime soon
I really appreciate the approach taken with every essay but this one is particularly relevant SBK. As someone who has spent the best part of twenty years working in the business development coaching space this is such a commonly used device (as you’ve pointed out) in marketing and self help; finding your body of work on Maslow many years ago was like oxygen. Lack of perspective taking, not using enough empathy to do it well and navigating egoic attachment to a particular “take” is all par for the course. It concerns me that all of this is hidden in AI output and algo signals but I mean that’s the point right? To keep looping on high alert and the pressure being placed on critical thinking skills and decision making abilities to perform under high uncertainty is very real. Thank you for giving our “Amy” amygdala strategies for focus (courtesy Sarai Speer at @theplatinumgiraffe https://www.instagram.com/p/Dau1NFsERLH/?igsh=am84NTg2dGppN3Ry) But that’s probably oversimplifying it ;-)
Spot on! I was just talking to a client about this yesterday. I also recognize the pattern in AI-speak and it drives me nuts. The 'it's this, not that' pattern is embedded in language and natural to how our brains process events and circumstances. Dichotomies remove the grey areas. Reducing life to one or the other reduces uncertainty. Although that feels safer, it often isn't. In my line of work, I see that it leaves people stuck in some bad places.
Love the phrase "artificial satisfaction," which seems to be prevalent in politics and current events, as much as in the self-help realm. The "artificial satisfaction" one feels that their side/belief is right, and the other is wrong, is destructively common these days. When and why did we begin to swim away from the deep waters of subtlety and nuance, to the shallow shore of "artificially satisfying" clarity? I always appreciate when you kick around at the bottom of the lake and create a most stimulating turbidity! You make learning, and being confronted by our own naivety, so much fun.
The information about AI is super interesting! And I've been wondering lately how much of our meta talk about AI will end up influencing AI as much as our writing about everything else has influenced it. Not so much like a self-fulfilling prophecy, but like AI is the child overhearing the parents talk about them in hushed tones from the next room. Anyway, most writing about AI seems to be regurgitated, so I admittedly don't read about it a ton, but I loved learning about the Atlantic piece. Thanks!
I love this topic. A favourite Niels Bohr quote I collected along the way: "The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."
SBK, this was a fantastic piece! Thank you and I'm going to share it with my adult children. Also, it reminded me of learning "systems thinking" in grad school. Some of its core ideas are: systems are made of interconnected parts; boundaries determine what you can see; causality is often circular, not linear; mental models shape actions. Yes/and is a powerful tool in helping one see the bigger picture and more of the underlying system.
There is a Beguiling Nature to the Search for Constancy
The world is not a neat and orderly place. It is battered by natural forces, economic uncertainty, and the vagaries caused by political disquiet. Adversity has always existed, to some extent, been the factor responsible for many personal and organizational failures. This has, however, encouraged humankind to try and understand, then manage capricious influences. Problem solving, then trial and error improvement have become the methods for changing conditions that interfere with the search for constancy.
Human nature is very much like a two-sided coin. It displays and reacts to dual inferences, each striving for attention. One side has a short-term orientation that is logical, and detailed, preferring facts over generalities. The other side has an extensive and broader perspective. It has a future orientation that appreciates feelings, imagination, images, and philosophy. Trying to build a constancy of purpose demands practices pay attention to implications presented by both sides. Facts that are data driven do not hold more weight than ideas backed by feelings and passion.
Being human means embracing both data and intuition. Recognize that emotions carry valuable information. Rather than suppressing feelings, use feelings as data to guide decision making. Interactions and self-awareness are approaches that help navigate the dynamics of decision making to create an environment where people comfortably take risks. By integrating both left and right hemisphere thinking into problem solving there is a better chance of finding workable solutions that will produce pride in high-quality outcomes.
Yes and thank you. Yes...and....onward through it all. The human condition is a tall order, the ultimate GAME. Role playing in reality. VIVA!
Thank you for this. Maturity, in my mind, is understanding that good and bad can exist in the same space, most often do. That I can criticise someone or something without this meaning that they/it cannot contain positive sides as well. That people and events are hardly ever split into good or bad. And that goes for the plethora of therapies out there: All contain something, none nothing.
I love how you open my mind. I've been thinking about this topic for a long time, and reading your article made everything click. It just felt right, and I can wholeheartedly embrace the "yes and yes" perspective. Funny enough, it also feels a little scary though... :))
My son has just got into shooting clay targets. He’s 12. I’m buddhist. His dad is an old hippy.
??!!??
I worry that this sport will harden his heart towards other living beings.
AND I see his delight and skill in shooting: that this is my son growing towards the light.
Is the fact that my son loves shooting a gun disturbing? Yes.
Is my son a compassionate boy being taught by a capable and kind man, who shares my son’s delight in watching the wedge-tailed eagles soar above them on the hilltop? And.
And the other thing about truth: of the three times (past, present and future), the present is where binaries collapse. So I’m doing my darndest not to let the conceptual overlays of the future muddy up my son’s deeply interesting and alive present paradox.
Thanks, Barry, once again, for shooting down stuck thinking wherever you see it. Binaries: BANG!
All I can say is Yes And Finally others bringing this to a wider audience. SBK I’ve been quietly building InsideOut Creativity built on both/and. The origin story is raising two kids because of the necessity of finding a both/and approach in the education system. Which there is not so far. So we did it differently. Both by respecting the system - think Structure (and) then Flexibility. It was hard. We felt isolated at times. However we have the proof that this way of doing it creates successful people - in an InsideOut way of living. They are kind. They are creative. They are confident. They aren’t interested in beating the system. It’s not having competitive advantage. It’s knowing how to work with the system.
These values are the foundation of my professional work. I have been building a method that has 7 Touchpoints - 7 paradoxes for living, learning and leading. Launching very soon
I am so happy to hear your voice on this loud and clear. Thank you.
I have Leading for Tomorrow ready to dive into. Are you going to do a book study on it? I’d love to join to learn more if that happens anytime soon
Once I became aware of the idea of false binaries, I started seeing them everywhere. Thanks for the great article.
100% this is a hallmark of being a normal human being. Perhaps this is even the decolonial pivot.
I really appreciate the approach taken with every essay but this one is particularly relevant SBK. As someone who has spent the best part of twenty years working in the business development coaching space this is such a commonly used device (as you’ve pointed out) in marketing and self help; finding your body of work on Maslow many years ago was like oxygen. Lack of perspective taking, not using enough empathy to do it well and navigating egoic attachment to a particular “take” is all par for the course. It concerns me that all of this is hidden in AI output and algo signals but I mean that’s the point right? To keep looping on high alert and the pressure being placed on critical thinking skills and decision making abilities to perform under high uncertainty is very real. Thank you for giving our “Amy” amygdala strategies for focus (courtesy Sarai Speer at @theplatinumgiraffe https://www.instagram.com/p/Dau1NFsERLH/?igsh=am84NTg2dGppN3Ry) But that’s probably oversimplifying it ;-)
Spot on! I was just talking to a client about this yesterday. I also recognize the pattern in AI-speak and it drives me nuts. The 'it's this, not that' pattern is embedded in language and natural to how our brains process events and circumstances. Dichotomies remove the grey areas. Reducing life to one or the other reduces uncertainty. Although that feels safer, it often isn't. In my line of work, I see that it leaves people stuck in some bad places.
Here im offering you even more exciting and inspiring perspectives
Hope you will like it (please read till the end)
https://substack.com/home/post/p-206503491
This is so timely for me personally
My entire Public Housing Block is undergoing relocation - I’m on the Residents committee
I will be forwarding it far and wide like a dandelion
One of my favourite pieces of writing from you lately. Love this so much!
Thanks Emily, means a lot!!!
Love the phrase "artificial satisfaction," which seems to be prevalent in politics and current events, as much as in the self-help realm. The "artificial satisfaction" one feels that their side/belief is right, and the other is wrong, is destructively common these days. When and why did we begin to swim away from the deep waters of subtlety and nuance, to the shallow shore of "artificially satisfying" clarity? I always appreciate when you kick around at the bottom of the lake and create a most stimulating turbidity! You make learning, and being confronted by our own naivety, so much fun.
The information about AI is super interesting! And I've been wondering lately how much of our meta talk about AI will end up influencing AI as much as our writing about everything else has influenced it. Not so much like a self-fulfilling prophecy, but like AI is the child overhearing the parents talk about them in hushed tones from the next room. Anyway, most writing about AI seems to be regurgitated, so I admittedly don't read about it a ton, but I loved learning about the Atlantic piece. Thanks!